Open Your Heart>>>

Open your heart, He said.
Follow Me, He said.
Let Me be the one that guides.
________________________________________________

________________________________________________

If you had asked me when I was days from turning 30, if I would have two young boys, be 30-weeks pregnant and caring for a newborn; all at the same time; I wouldn't have believed you. I wouldn't have thought I could handle it.

Truth. I can't handle it.
Truth. He can sustain, and He has got this.

If you had asked me even just a few weeks ago, I wouldn't have expected this. But, "My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts," says the LORD. "And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine" (Isaish 55:8).

These ten tiny toes have altered my heart in ways that I never would have known. They have transformed our family, and taught us how to love in a new way.  This sweet little girl has forever changed us.

We don't know how long she will be a part of our family, but we have been, and are so thankful for the time we have had with her. 

She is a blessing. 
She is wanted. 
She is loved.

Face-to-Face with Grace.

There seem to be countless moments in each day that you have the choice to shower someone with grace, or cover them with pain. Many of these moments are small and fleeting, but some, depending on your choice, may have a lifelong impact.  The thing is, this impact can be negative, but it can also be overwhelmingly, and powerfully positive.

Young lives are shaped by the grace that's shown them. They watch how the adults in their lives react towards each other. They learn how they should respond; even when the learned responses are wrong. The thing is adults make mistakes. The problem comes, when those mistakes effect the people around them. For thousands of innocent children, their lives will forever be changed due to the choices made by the very parents that were suppose to love them.

This is the hard reality when it comes to foster care and adoption. In order for a child to be removed from their birthparents, somewhere pain had to happen. Somehow, that child's view of grace was shattered or skewed. They've had to learn how to survive. In some cases, that can result in seeking love from anyone, while in other instances, it means a complete blocking of letting people in.

There is hope. True grace, God's grace, is mightier than sin, it's stronger than any pain. It doesn't erase it, but it covers it; it can make someone new. I've seen it happen. It is amazing. See, true grace can be played out in people.

People can display grace to others. 

I saw this in the life of three year old Katie*. Sweet Katie was placed into a foster home. Her mommy and daddy weren't there, and now there were these new people. These people whispered in her ear that she's be safe, that they would be there always. But, even at the young age of three, Katie had already put up walls to protect herself. Those sweet words, were just words, and needed to be backed up with actions. I'm sure she must of had thoughts about if they would still be there if she misbehaved. Would they still say they loved her if she threw her food or wet the bed? Would they rock her to sleep, and hold her gently, or would she have to be so careful and quiet so no physical pain would come to her?

I met Katie at a Foster Parent Night Out, after she was placed in this new foster home. This home that would love her reguardless of her faults. That would teach her, and shower her with grace. That would attempt to break down those walls she had needed to construct, and show her unconditional God's love. Over the months, I watched as this quiet little girl learned to trust. She began to make eye contact; she began to smile.

On our final evening of the year, she was sitting on my lap, with her big brown eyes staring into mine. She grabbed my hand, smiled and just held on. As I looked into her eyes, I realized that I was face-to-face with grace. It had been played out right in front of me:

 "And after you have suffered a little while, 

the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, 

will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you."

1 Peter 5:10

Restore. Confirm. Strengthen. Establish.

These are the steps that this foster family took. These are the steps that freed this little girl, and prepared her to trust again. These are the steps that transformed her into a different little girl, a little girl who won't stop talking, who smiles and who loves. These are the steps that will now help her to transition from being this family's foster daughter, to someone's adopted daughter. 

Grace.

...

So thankful for this lesson I learned. I already am thoughtfully practing showing grace to my own children, and look forward to the day that we can shower this same grace and love on the child we adopt. 

*Her name was changed to protect her.

Crusty Cheese.

If there was a picture that could sum up a moment in life, it could be crusty Mac & Cheese. I had just baked some fresh bread, well the bread machine had, and I had my favorite candle burning. Needless to say, the house smelled good. Maybe it was me trying to cover up the other "smells" that also seemed to keep 'popping' out that day too, but for the moment it smelled good.

As I walked out of the kitchen though, it hit me, I had two pictures, or points of view, I could choose to focus on today. One was clean, fresh and relaxing. The other was dirty, tasteless and stinky. Seems like an obvious choice which picture I or anyone would choose, but it's interesting how easy it is to pick the crusty over the delicious.

________________

"...I have set before you life and death, 

blessings and curses. Now choose life..." 

Deuteronomy 30:19
________________

It's a choice. Each day, each moment, I have a choice as to how I'm going to view what is going on around me. Do I have to love the dirty and smelly, absolutely not, but I don't have to dwell in them. I also shouldn't ignore those things, because even if I wished they would just disappear, the stinky things of life are going to continue to happen. So, I can deal with the yucky stuff, and then spend my time dwelling the the yummy stuff; resting in the good.

So now I'm going to go clean up a baby, rinse off some crusty cheese, and take in some good.

While I'm Waiting.

While cleaning the house today a song came on that spoke directly to what I have been thinking about over the past few years.  "While I'm Waiting," by John Waller, are lyrics to what my heart has been feeling. 

"I'm waiting

I'm waiting on You, Lord

And I'm HOPEFUL

I'm waiting on You, Lord

Though it is painful

But PATIENTLY, I will wait."

The thing is, we all are waiting for something. Whether it is waiting for a job, marriage, children or a cure for pain, we all wait. So many of my friends and family are waiting for the Lord to answer their hearts desire. Prayers that are so selfless, and so in line with what is pure and good. As people, it is hard to see why these prayers are not answered quicker, or even answered at all. I am starting to learn as I wait for His timing, His plan, that amongst the waiting, I don't have to wait to live for Him.

"I will move ahead, BOLD and CONFIDENT
Taking every step in obedience
While I'm waiting I will serve You
While I'm waiting I will worship
While I'm waiting I will not faint
I'll be running the race Even while I wait." 

The words, bold and confident, are so powerful. When we are wavering, He is strong. When we feel alone, He is there with His arms open. He is waiting for us to come to Him. My confidence does not need to stem from what I feel needs to happen, but rather, spring from what He is and has done in my life. 

While I rest in His timing, and His plan, I should not wait then to serve and worship Him. All that surrounds me; my family, friends, home and health are all held together by Him. 

His telling me to, "Wait," does not mean that He is silent, 

it might just be that He is wanting me to stop and lean on Him.

Traditions.

Christmas is a time that is filled with traditions; ones that you celebrate as family. From going to the tree farm, and selecting the perfect tree to cut down and bring home, to decorating sugar cookies with friends. So far this season I have done both of these things, along with many others; but in light of the recent events taking place in our world, I have been struck with how thankful I am that for me and my family Christmas is more than a tree, cookies or gifts.

For some, accepting God's gift of His own Son is the hardest gift to open on Christmas morning. Maybe it's easier to wrap up toys or clothes, than to open up their own heart to a gift that is beyond our human understanding.

The fact is, the angels we place on top of our Christmas trees, that we work so hard to get to stand up straight, represent the hosts of angels that came to the lowly shepards over 2,000 years ago declaring,

 "Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. 

Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord. 

This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger." 

Luke 2:10-17

The lights that we string around our tree, and adorn every eve and crest of our homes, were originally placed to showcase the fact that Christ is the 'light of the world.' The gifts that we spend hours agonizing over and wrapping are meant to represent the gifts that the wisemen brought Jesus after following a star.

This Christmas I challenge you to pause, even for a moment, to reflect on the simplicity of a baby; a baby that came to save the world...a big task, but not one to large for a God that loves us so much. The gift is simply waiting...it might not be the most flashy gift under your tree, but it certainly is the only gift that will last forever.